It’s been a very long time since I’ve written a blog post.
I was going to write about my story of four different pastas I once had at a party and also the untimely death of Anthony Bourdain but then I’ve upgraded my computer to Win10 and forgot to back up the articles. So, I don’t feel like rewriting that article. It took too long and I got stuck in my thought process. So instead of revisiting the same topic, I’ve decided to move on.
Right now, it’s 3am in Hawaii, I can’t sleep but I’m really enjoying the scenery here in Ko Olina. The weather is nice, people are lovely and the beach is next to the resort we’re staying at. It took us a long ass flight to get here but this is totally worth it. Oh boy do I have to tell you about the flights. For those who are thinking about travelling with an infant, take this advice from me. Do not, and I repeat, do not travel alone with an infant unless you’re the primary caretaker and you’ve had practice before. The first flight from Shanghai to Taipei was an absolute nightmare. Justin cried almost the entire time. You know the parent with nonstop crying baby, that everyone stares at on the plane? That was me. I felt to embarrassed but more important, I felt bad for Justin, poor kid. He was stuck with me. The flight from Taipei to Hawaii was rather easy actually, I was ready, everything was prepared, and Justin pretty much slept the whole way through. Thank you Jesus!
Slept like an angel
On the flight to Hawaii, I requested a baby basinet, which was super helpful, the only problem is with the basinet set up, there isn’t enough space to put up the TV, so while Justin’s asleep, there’s zero entertainment for the entire flight, so I started to take interest in the people’s screens next to me. Sitting to my left is a lady in her thirties with terrible taste in movies, she watched two fast and furious movies, and another movie starring 50 cent, Gerard Butler, “Nick Sabotka” from the Wire, and a bunch of cameos from fighters from the UFC (Jimmy’s Rule on Movies: If there is more than one UFC fighter in a movie, that movie is gonna suck). And sitting to my right is a young boy around 11 or 12 yr old, who is probably the worst video games player ever. The kid didn’t watch any movies and went straight to the games and this kid did not try to understand the rules to the games he’s playing. He just kept swiping and tapping randomly and failing game after game. After failing through 3~4 different games, he finally settled on Angry Birds. This kid possibly is the worst Angry Birds player EVER. I tried to explain to him, use the yellow bird for the wood, the blue birds for the ice, and the black bird for the bricks, yet, after nearly hours of practice the kid does not seem to care about how to beat each stage strategically, he just kept swiping randomly and was so proud, to pass whatever random stage he would pass by chance, and eagerly showed off to his mom – “Look mom, three stars”.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH TODAY’S KIDS?
I remember when I was young, we played video games not just to pass the stage, it was to beat the high score and have your name there forever. I remember practicing hours at a time on Mario Kart 64, trying to hop over that wall in the stadium to save a lap, practicing the Guile shadow throw in Streetfighter 2, and killing all your friends in Golden Eye. We didn’t just want to have fun, we wanted bragging rights.
The mobile phones has turned us all into a bunch of lazy zombies. Every game is swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe with minimal thinking. This dumbing down of video games unfortunately has permeated into various aspects of the younger generation’s culture. Kids today, don’t know courtship anymore, it’s swipe right, swipe left, you up? Dick pic? Wanna bang?
We live in the age of instant gratification.
I’m hungry – use E Le Me
Too lazy to go grocery shopping – use He Ma
Don’t want to go to a crowded Zara to get new clothes, just order a bunch online, keep what you like and return the rest – this is exactly what my wife does.
Everything is about instant gratification. There is almost no patience in anything we do anymore…
And in the spirit of instant gratification, I present to you, instant noodles. Something you can quickly put together when you’re lazy or drunk!
Here are my tips…
1 - Add an egg
2 - Find whatever scraps of meat that’s leftover in the fridge
3 - Veggies, any kind…
4 - Scallions or cilantro for texture and aromatics
